15 May 2004
15 May 2004Unknown Classics:
1. A Muppet Christmas Carol - It stars the muppets for godssakes, and it has the sweetest Christmas songs.
2. 12:01 - Average Joe is in love with a bombshell scientist (played by no less than Supergirl) after a lovelorn day he suffers an electric shock that finally makes him unique AND able to save the day; I read in "Baked Potatoes: A Potsmoker's Guide to Film + Video" that "Groundhog Day" lifted its concept from this movie.
3. Romancing the Stone - Michael Douglas does a Harrison Ford in this Indiana Jones type movie and he's pretty convincing. Onscreen chemistry with Kathleen Turner and Danny De Vito works so well they had two other films together ("Jewel of the Nile" and "War of the Roses").
4. Robin Hood - Why Patrick Bergin never crossed over to mainstream hunkdom I'll never understand when the guy is clearly a studmuffin. Pre-Pulp Fiction Uma Thurman is ethereally beautiful as Maid Marian and delivers the most delicious line in the movie. (I was waiting for her to add "Nyah-nyah!!!" then stick her tongue out. That would have made it perfect. Hee-hee.)
5. Handsome Siblings - This movie (nay, this monument!) of Chinese filmmaking deserves no less than a full summary:
Two martial arts masters, played by the gorgeous Cheung Man and some Chinese guy, have a son, much to the dissapointment of Cheung's character who promptly killed her lover in a lover's spat. She was furious because she felt cheated out of an heir for her all-women cult (Lotus something-something, obviously I'm terrible with remembering names).
Fortunately, some bystanders were able to save the baby boy. Cheung (let's just use the actors' names since my memory banks are completely dried up) meanwhile adopts a baby girl...and raises her as a son (go figure). The baby girl grows up to be film goddess Brigitte Lin (pause to hyperventilate) star of such classics as "Dragon Inn" and "The Bride with White Hair". Meanwhile, the boy is raised by a bunch of thieves (the comic relief, actually) and rises to become their leader. Appropriately played by a-hunka-hunka-burnin-love Andy Lau (who is so hot, I have to fan myself) star of "The God of Gamblers" (with the divine Chow Yun-Fat and also Cheung Man, but I digress) and the mega-hit Infernal Affairs.
Now, there's this huge martial arts tournament (also a huge cliche) that brings them together. On their way to the tournament, Lin masquerades as a man surrounded by a coterie of female followers, while Lau travels with his posse of assorted rascals. Lau happens upon the house where Lin is staying who is in the middle of a girlish fit (a similar tantrum that Jake had when she popped her shirt to show Hamilton her bra in "Young Americans"). To the dismay of her chaperones she goes of flying in a dress (with Chinese attire during that time can anyone really tell?) and is spotted by an enthralled Lau. So (ahem) moved he was that he drools...literally.
When they meet again, Lau has the difficult task of wooing Lin who is once again the cool young master of a fearsome clan. To complicate things Lau's mom (Cheung's still alive!) is going nuts and dies horribly near the end of the movie.
Eventually, Lin succumbs and they have to flee the evil master that organized the tournament. Lin and Lau develop a fighting style where for some reason they end their movies by being in the first position for a waltz (it's supposed to be sweet, but it's kind of funny).
Most of the details of the film are murky due to the translation and since the last time I watched this was in high school, but it has made permanent residence in my All Time Top Ten Faves. Campy and loads of fun. (Fans of the genre will also enjoy "Super Heroic Trio" and "The Magic Flute" both starring the late great Anita Mui. On a side note, new HK sour beauty Karen Mok's film antics reminds me so much of Mui's brand of comedy, action, and sultriness, that I briefly confused the two.)
posted by Otherwise Maladroit @ 6:00 PM
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